Of all the talents that a person can possess my deepest, fondest wish is to draw. I find it so unfair that my sister can draw so well, while I can barely grasp a pen and put it to paper. My great-aunt was an artist, so is my aunt. My house is decorated by the beautiful creations my dear aunt made out of sheer boredom while visiting us last year. Every time I look at the pictures - vivid multi-coloured birds - I’m wistful. I asked my sister once why she stopped drawing and painting; she merely shrugged and replied, “I have two children.” I suppose that’s a good excuse, but I often wonder whether she enjoyed it even. Her art portfolio from high school used to be my favourite thing to look at when I was growing up. She, being seven years older than me, got to experience all of those classes which I eagerly awaited for at that age. I still remember a gigantic oak tree she drew on one of the pages. There was no reason for it, it was just a doodle, but it was gorgeous. Sadly, that’s the only thing I remember from her portfolio. As I entered high school, her former art teacher would become my art teacher.

The only art class I ever took, I did quite well in, to be honest. At least, from what I can remember, I think I did quite well. I never received any negative comments, at least. Yet, I never doodled as much as the other kids. Merely did the work assigned and that was it. I still remember the study of a male nude that we all had to draw; I chose the hands and feet to draw - the hardest. It was my greatest accomplishment because it actually came out looking alright! I didn’t value it for what it truly was when I had it then and I let it get thrown out. I wish sometimes I hadn’t because it could have given me some inspiration. Which is what I truly need, I think, because I have the desire to draw but I lack the confidence because I don’t feel that I would be able to draw well. Maybe one day I’ll take an art class, learn how to draw from someone who knows. I know I’ll never be a great artist, but I think I would take great pleasure out of creating something with my hands. Besides, what exactly is a “great” artist? There are lots of artists out their who find their own conventions to follow, instead of conforming to someone else’s.

I deeply respect the artists of the Renaissance, but I know I would never be able to paint anywhere near that good. I mean, those men (for they were mostly men, I’m afraid) must have been touched by the Hand of God himself. I’ve seen those paintings in real life and I cannot explain to you, or even attempt to, the sheer magnitude of their beauty. How these artists were able to create such glory is completely beyond me. Hand of God, I tell you. Hand of God.

In other news, I haven’t spent any money today! Which is excellent for me, since I just got paid and … well, I’m always tempted to blow my wad (pardon the vulgarity ;)) on something stupid that I don’t need. Hey, here’s an idea … maybe I should pay my bills? Hmm … food for thought.

Two more days until my parents leave on vacation!