Gloryfades.org

Spring is really marching by isn’t it? Sorry for the minor absence there while we moved. I didn’t expect to be gone for so long but with all of the tasks that come along with moving to a new house (unpacking, painting, buying furniture, etc.) I found that I was no longer as interested in the internet life as I was before. This has been steadily growing for a few months, actually. I don’t think it’s that I’ve lost interest in the Internet. Rather, it’s what I do currently do online now that I’ve grown bored with, which is primarily the fanlistings.

With that realization, I started to scale back on what I do in the community - closing websites and resigning from the Senior Staff, as well as handing some of my other duties to different volunteers. I feel better about my future with TFL now that I’ve done that. I don’t want to leave entirely but I was concerned that with the path I was going down I would burn out. My main goal was not to cut and run - the community hates when that happens and as a senior member, that would have been a really crappy thing to do.

My future goals? I’m probably going to continue focusing on my blog, reshaping and retooling. I want to start promoting myself more, getting back into the community. People like Kya continue to amaze me with their unique style and I want to draw more inspiration and learn new things again.

Now that I’m living with G I also have to learn how to prioritize my tasks. I have a lot less time than I once did as a poor student living at home. It sucks cause I find myself having to do things like schedule time to see friends!

So that’s my life and mindset in a nutshell right now. Along with the new house, I have a new job at a really awesome company. I’m doing something more along the lines of what I can see becoming a career - I’ve always loved books (big surprise, eh?) so working at a publishing company is a real dream come true.

Also, I haven’t had a Diet Coke all month.

I think the winter really is getting to me. This weekend was pretty productive; I felt restless for a majority of it and it ended up paying off - I wiped my hard drive clean and reinstalled Windows. All I can say is, thank God for MDG Computers and their step-by-step instructions. If it weren’t for the idiot-guide they provided (which was totally what I needed) I think it would have gone a lot worse. I went to G’s on Sunday so I couldn’t finish putting all the programs I need back onto it, but I’m excited to finish that up tonight. The best part is finding the next generation programs that my old girl couldn’t handle before because of the trash clogging her up. Microsoft Office 2007, here I come!

The one thing I didn’t do was partition the hard drive. I was worried that I would do something wrong so I’ll leave it until the next time I feel brave enough to wipe out everything on my computer, lol. Now that I’ve done it once, though, I’m fairly confident I can do it again. Baby steps!

I must not be the only one who enjoys clearing out her computer, am I? You have to admit that there’s a real pleasure in restoring your computer to its factory settings, n’est pas?

*Quiet silence*

Okay, so I’m the only nerd on the block … I get it. Whatever!

Further evidence of my nerdiness? At lunch today, I went to the dollar store and bought a candy bowl and some Easter candy for my desk at work. Yes, I’ve become that admin assistant - the one with the food. I must say, it looks pretty snazzy. It’s full of Easter Hershey’s kisses and fake Easter “grass” (the kind you put into an Easter basket). The grass cost me a dollar - I wasn’t going to say no to that kind of value, ok?

On that note, I think it’s time to sign off. There’s mucho to do to get this computer back in working order. Did you know that you can’t even install Itunes if you don’t have Windows XP Service Pack 2?! I’m living in the stone ages! I gotta upgrade!

Break time! I’m cleaning again this afternoon. My b-day dinner shindig extravaganza is tonight and Daniela will be staying the night. Melba, unfortunately, has contracted some unfortunate illness and has to miss out on the festivities. Get better, Melbs! I hold no grudges!

So what else is new? Well, I have good news: I have a permanent position at my job. AND I have time off to go traveling!! I couldn’t stop jumping up and down last night after work like a little kid on Christmas. Maybe that’s why I’m listening to Christmas music now? My Christmas wish has come true! I’m going on holiday!!

The next step is to actually figure out where, though. G. and I know we want to do something warm but G. also suggested Tokyo. Japan would be a great holiday spot, I think, but not very warm… we’d still have to wear coats which I would rather not do. Still, it’s worth looking in to. Has anyone ever gone on vacation around Christmastime? Got any stories? Was it worth it/a nightmare?

I wouldn’t mind doing the resort thing for awhile but I don’t think G. will want to do it for the whole trip. We’d rather see some of the actual country as well rather than a tiny portion set aside for vacationers.

In further news, I’ve discovered the wonderful simplicity and convenience of the RSS feed. I’ve added all of the blogs I read regularly to it and it’s so easy to use - it may even get me to read blogs even more regularly. I think a large part of my I stopped reading regular blogs and sort of shifted towards Livejournal for awhile was because at LJ I could read all of the posts in one place - I didn’t have to go searching. I know, I’m a lazy beast, but if the RSS Feed wasn’t so popular I would think it’s just me. It ain’t. Everyone and your mom seems to have an RSS Feed if they own a blog. I largely ignored mine (which automatically comes with Wordpress) until I figured out how to read an RSS Feed. I just assumed it was for blackberries or something. Boy, was I wrong!

Anyway, enough gushing. I should get back to the dust and the clutter… Can’t let Daniela think I live in a hovel!

Edit: Homg, did anyone else know that Prince William is going bald??? That’s tragic, he’s so handsome.

Source: Styledash.com

Usually the drive home sucks - I commute about an hour and a half on the way home.

Yesterday, I had to snap a pic, though:

Driving into oblivion

I swear to God, I’m still alive! I’ve been woefully neglecting this but it’s not worth it to recap what’s happened over the past month. Suffice it to say, the best part was that I no longer work at a convenience store, woo! That’s right, I’m a bookseller now, people. You’re reading the journal of Chapter Ancaster’s newest employee. It’s nice to have a job that I’m happy with.

I should be in bed, I really should. 12:30am and I’m not asleep? I have class from 10 until 6 tomorrow night. I have a presentation AND a tutorial. I should be in bed. Oi.

I can’t stop listening to Chris Daughtry’s new single. I don’t even watch American Idol and I want to do this guy just from the sound of his voice. What can I say? I’m a sucker for Top 40. Does that make me a bad person? A sheep? Perhaps, but at least I’m a content sheep.

Ooh, now it’s Christina Aguilera’s new single. I’m totally listening to Top 40, what’s up with that? Where’s my Tiesto, I need to change this ….

There we go. Anyway, so I’m supposed to be in bed but I’m still winding down from my final shift at the Sev. I don’t think I’ve mentioned this but my store has been shut down by the Corporation since we’re not making a high enough profit. I’ve been moved to a store that’s up on the mountain. This makes it slightly more inconvenient to get to work now but at the very least I still have my part time job. I didn’t know until today that I was moved and not laid off. I guess it’s a good thing. To be honest, I’m so busy with school that I wouldn’t even be that upset if I was laid off. Of course, I would look for another job so this saves me some time. I should look for a new job anyway because this one’s pretty shit but I guess my focus really isn’t on anything that isn’t academic right now. I mean, I haven’t seen my boyfriend properly in ages, it seems. I do school work while at work, it’s insane. I’ve barely been on the Internet this past while too.

I guess it’s a good thing but I’m hoping this doesn’t lead to me totally crashing and burning. I’m aware that this momentum will more than likely stop eventually but I don’t want it to happen when I most need it (IE, when I’ve got essays due).

Tomorrow I’m going back to the gym and back to choir. I haven’t been to choir practice since school started and I don’t want to quit. I really have no excuse either. Two hours on Monday evenings, an hour after classes end, is not the end of the world. I need to suck it up and start going back because it’s fun and I get to learn songs I would otherwise never have had the chance to sing, damn it. So yes, I’m going back.

I think it’s high time I finally wrote something down. Last week was stressful and it’s only promising to get worse, I fear. While I’m excited by the new semester I’m also sort of mind-boggled by how much work I have ahead of me. Everyone I’ve come into contact with for the past little while has already had their ear talked off regarding this but I’m still going to say it anyway - seven courses is a lot of work and I’m not sure whether I can handle all of this. Furthermore, OSAP fucking me over is also putting a bit of a damper on things. Normally, I’d have most of my books by now but I’ve only got two at the moment, one of which I still need to pay for. I’m trying to find a new job at school because the store is giving me one shift every two weeks which is frankly ridiculous. I’m relying heavily on my parents which I don’t like doing. I need money for books but I’m hesitant to say something because I feel guilty and … I don’t know, I just hate doing it. I feel like I’m stealing or something.

Ugh, I don’t honestly know why it’s making me depressed. It’s only a few more months and I will be done. I’ll finally get myself a full-time job and I’ll eventually pull myself out of this student-life mire that I’ve buried myself into these past four years. I tell you, getting an education really sucks!

What’s worse is that I’m also second-guessing my plans to leave university. Perhaps it’s just a silly mindfuck I’m playing on myself but I feel like these past four years have been … well, useless. I’m going to get out of university with a degree in Arts and Contemporary Studies with an emphasis in global studies (not even a proper major) and a minor in marketing and what will I do then? I could find myself doing data entry for the next two years in some corporate dungeon on Bay Street, wondering why I never chose to do something more. I chose global studies because I’m interested in international relations. Does the government even hire undergrads anymore? Is foreign service even an option when your degree is only slightly related to your dream job? Everyone says that you rarely find a job in the field that you studied. What if you want to, though?

It just feels like I’ve shot myself in the foot by not applying for grad school. Not that I could get in, that is. I mean, I’m just finally cleaning off the mess of my third year and I’ve barely been involved in anything at school. Plus, do I really want to spend another two years living at home? Not really. No, if I were even to think about a Masters it would definitely not be done from home. I am finished living here. I need to grow up and start doing things on my own.

I guess the bottom line is, I’m worried that I won’t be successful post-grad. I don’t want to have to live pay cheque to pay cheque because I didn’t go to business school or law school. So suffice it to say I am a little depressed over the impending future. I think I just need to go back to the Career Centre and really start looking at all of the possible career options I have.